For The Singles!

To most people, their life doesn't even begin until they find their significant other. To be merry, to fit in, to find happiness, they think they need to be in a relationship, to be part of a couple. I understand the need for companionship. The need to be loved. To have someone to share your life with. Someone who actually cares what becomes of you. Someone to share your highs and lows with. Someone, anyone!

I'm not saying being in or wanting to be in a relationship is wrong. I'm just saying you shouldn't leave your life in a state of ambiguity until someone comes along. You should know by now how humongous my faith in love is. You should also know I believe that true love is worth the wait. Why? Because if you get impatient, you settle. And if you settle, you end up hurt and with a broken heart. Your heart can only take so much abuse. Isn't it about time you started taking care of your heart? It's too precious to be handed over to just anyone.

I would like for all my readers to practice something called self-love. I'm sure you've all heard of it one way or another. Simply put, it is the act of loving one's self. I must confess that this particular exercise isn't all that easy and so it should be faked until you start to believe it. A couple of years ago, when I was dealing with my bout of depression, it was hard to find one thing I liked about myself(I'm not saying that it has become any easier recently) but, if I look in the mirror and hate the fact that I still haven't shed that extra weight, I tell myself that I love my eyes. I tell myself that if I didn't gain that little extra weight, nobody would notice my dimple.

On days that I can't find anything physical to love about myself, I tell myself how much I love my writing(I write some private pieces that are solely dedicated to me). I tell myself how much I love the fact that I'm brutally honest, that I love my big heart, my compassion for humanity...things that boost my ego(also things that are very true). Do you have to wait until someone comes along and compliments on your good features before you actually notice them? There is also a need for you to learn to accept compliments graciously. When someone compliments on something wonderful about you(even, if it's about your lips that you don't like that much), say thank you. Don't tell them reasons why your lips aren't that good. Just say thank you.

Ladies, this post is for you in case you're yet to reach that conclusion. I know you want a home, a husband and kids...no kidding. I want that too!!! But your sole ambition in life shouldn't be to get married. There's still so much out there. So much uncharted territories you're yet to set foot in. I'm not all that different from the average woman(except for a couple of tweaks here and there), there are days when all I can think about is if I would ever have the whole package. It takes conscious effort to not be (like Dr. Sheldon Cooper of BBT would say), "slaves to our desire to mate and reproduce"! Lol!

Seriously, I get the whole biological time thing. I know some people think you have to be at a certain age before you hear it tick, I disagree. I'm in my very early 20s and I hear it loud and clear. It just won't shut up. I don't let it rule me though. You want to end up with the right person. Trust me, there are horrible consequences for ending up with the wrong person. Life suddenly becomes unbearable if you're not with the perfect match for you. I like to illustrate to people that choosing a partner is like shopping for shoes. If you get the wrong size you're going to regret it later. A lot! If it's too small, it pinches and you get bunions, too big and your stride is affected. You need one that fits just right. A shoe that fits right adds to your overall appearance. Likewise, a good partner adds to your life.

As a single, you get to do certain things you can't do as a part of a couple. Every mistake you make can't hurt someone else. You can do more and be more. That's why you see cases where single people are more productive than people with significant others. Personally, I believe one should embrace singlehood. Love every single moment of it. The moment you're hitched, you can't have any of it back and I'm sure you would rather have your awesome memories. You wouldn't like to look back and realize you did nothing productive while waiting for love to sweep you off your feet. It's important that you bring something into your  future relationship.

Stop moping because you're alone and all your friends are hooked up. Enjoy life. Have fun and try out new things. Pamper you. Travel. Develop new hobbies. Further your education or your career. Do anything. Do something. Don't just sit on your tushy waiting. Don't let time pass you by. Be joyful....be grateful...be vibrant. Love YOU!

Eventually, Prince Charming will come along, he'll be glad he doesn't have to break you out of a tower because you got out all by yourself! He'll respect you for it too.

Remember; you can be Single & Happy.