How Do You Know If It's Love?

Do not be decieved by the title of this post. I do not intend to tell you how to figure out when it's really love. On the contrary, I'm looking to find out the answer of that question myself. I think I know the text-book answer but something tells me that in this case as well as in other cases like it, the theory is not has in depth as the practical.

I feel like I've retrogressed a bit. Emotionally and psychologically. I honestly do not get why I can't just be as objective about this as I tend to be about other matters of the heart. What if it is love and you refuse to accept it for what it truly is? Love can not be quantified. It cannot be gauged or measured. So, how then can you know if it is truly love?

Is it when you care about the other party? I doubt that theory works for me. I tend to care about everyone in my life. I'm a caring person. So...caring about someone doesn't mean I love them. Is it when you worry about them when you don't hear from them(even to the extent of thinking they might have died or slipped on the stairs at work?)? I'm a worry-wart. I always worry. It's what I do best. So that can't be it either.

Most people gravitate towards love but I've always been good at running the other way. I'm in love with love...but I'm not in love with the idea of actually being in love(do you get that?). I don't look forward to being that vulnerable. Okay...so...how does one know if it's love? There's no test for it is there? And all those online quizzes are just wack.

I asked a friend and she said, "You just know." And I retorted by letting her know her answer is why she has been so unlucky in the game of love. I don't think it just happens. I truly believe you make a conscious decision to love. It takes a particular level of commitment on your part. It's a risk and if you're not a risk-taker, don't jump off that cliff...I repeat do not jump.

What about the "He loves me", "He loves me not" crap? Do you really expect silly games like that to answer such a critical question? Can you not love someone and still want them to stay and be with you? Isn't that being selfish?

How can you be with someone for about 8 months and know through it all for an absolute fact that it isn't love and then be with another person for a less than 3 weeks and be confused enough to wonder if it is love? How can human emotions be so fucking fickle though?

I don't know what my point is...but when you find it, please point it out to me.

I need to unwind don't I? I've been a bit strung up lately.

It's another Friday...I hope it was a wonderful week for you all.

Have a lovely weekend!!!