Self-Love, Self-Worth, Self-Esteem & Spirituality.

A couple of days ago, an acquaintance of mine asked me why I constantly promote self-love, self-worth and having a healthy self-esteem. He felt it was a sin and that I was teaching people to put themselves first(even though sometimes it is necessary to do that, even my pastor says Christianity does not equal foolishness) and above every other thing. I try to make it clear that my blog isn't a religious or spiritual blog. While I don't get all spiritual in every post, I know that faithful readers of my blog can deduce that I am a spiritual woman and that I do not joke with God's place in my life. I have never tried to make anybody think that they can do anything or be anything without God. Being the kind of person that I am, after my discussion/argument with that acquaintance I felt the need to write a post to clear the air. After all, there might be others out there that feel the same way.

I am more into spirituality than into organized religion. That is not saying that I don't appreciate the value that fellow-shipping with the saints of God has on my spiritual life. God is the only constant factor. The only consistency humans enjoy in a life that can be so unpredictable. He is our safety net. I would never advice anyone to find anything or acquire anything outside God. I understand the kind of world we live in now is filled with fanatical beliefs and all that but I have tried so hard to strike a balance. Like Apostle Paul, I've tried to become all things to all men (1 Corinthians 9:19-23). I understand that everyone is flawed and that's only because I'm not blind to my own flaws. I tell people often that the reason so many avoid the church is because they are made to feel more like sinners in the fold than outside in the world. Who are you to judge who the Lord has forgiven?

Anyway, back to the issue of self-love. You need to understand that self-love is not the same as ego or pride. Practicing self-love doesn't mean that you are self-centered or narcissistic. Yes, there should be a balance to everything. Too much of everything, even if it is good, is bad. I always emphasize the need to strike a balance. No balance and the world topples. Remember that self-love, self-worth and self-esteem are more or less the same. You cannot have one without the other. I want to fulfill all righteousness though and so I will define each term on its own.

Self-Love: regard for one's own well-being and happiness.

Self-Worth: the sense of one's own value or worth as a person.

Self-Esteem: this reflects a person's overall subjective emotional evaluation of his or her own worth. It is a judgment of oneself as well as an attitude toward the self.

Now that we have the definitions covered, we can go on to the nitty-gritty of things. I need you to emphasize once again that if there's no balance, self-love can lead to a narcissistic character, something we don't want to happen. It might lead to a sense of entitlement, god complex, etc. Like Sam Smith sang, “too much of a good thing won't be good for long”. Now, I'll address this terms from a spiritual point of view for the sake of readers who share the same views as the acquaintance mentioned above. I will be giving biblical examples that support the 3. Let me just start by saying, how can you believe God loves you and not love yourself? Have you ever tried picturing yourself the way He sees you? Go through the pages of the Bible and you'll see exactly how He sees you. He calls you beloved, the apple of His eye, He even sent His only begotten son to die for your sins. That's like the ultimate sacrifice. Jesus accepted His cross only because of the love He has for you and I. So, if He calls you worthy, who are you to question that? Because I want to ensure that every one reads this to the end and understand the message embedded within, I will be breaking the posts into 2 or 3. I don't want you having the excuse that the post was too long and that you lost interest midway. I'll make it all short and to the point. Because I love you and I want you to understand that it is important that you learn to love yourself.

To be continued...

(Definitions culled from Wikipedia)