Let's Talk About Our Relationships!

How do you know if you're in the right relationship?  How do you know if your partner is the right choice for you? How do you know if your relationship will stand the test of time? How do you know if you got it right this time? Choosing the right relationship is a lot like shopping for new shoes. If you get the wrong ones you can be sure that you would be in for a world of pain what with all the pinching and discomfort while walking. What are you left with?  Corns and bunions! But what if you get the right ones? My God, you would be in fashion heaven. Lol! When you wear them, you know they make your legs look good, you know they complement your dressing and add a sort of elegance/swag to your walk. They fit you just right.

While I might not be an expert on fashion, I do know that if you're uncomfortable with what you're wearing you never get the best out of that look. You're busy fidgeting with one thing or the other. I know some people say you should suffer for your fashion but that's only for celebrities and models. Most of them do the same thing with their relationships. They stay with the wrong person, afterall, it's mostly for publicity right?  I'm not saying all are not genuine, I am just saying some aren't. Since you're not a celebrity, I'm guessing the reason you venture into relationships are also quite different. You want a relationship because you want to feel loved, because of companionship, because you want someone who's always got your back.

People never realize in time that they are in a wrong relationship. This is all because of the rose-glass theory. You know if you try to look into a building which has rose-glass windows, you only see what you want to see and everything else is a silhouette. The theory says pretty much the same thing when it comes to relationships. You only see what you want to see in your partner and very readily and sometimes unconsciously ignore their flaws and all the warning signs they emit. Not entirely your fault though because when a person is 'in love' common sense literally jumps out the window. This is when being patient comes handy.

It is necessary that you be patient until this phase passes so you are certain you want to be with the other person, flaws and all. Your compatibility, personal tolerances, future goals, etc., should play major roles in your decision process. It is not enough that they look good and have certain physical attributes you covet, am sorry to say this, it is not enough to love as well, there has to be something that acts as your foundation or kindling, something that has the ability to exist even after the fire goes out. That thing has to be enough to hold you together or it will be the very thing that tears you apart.

For the married, I do not support divorce. I believe that if we work really hard at it, there is nothing that cannot be solved or fixed. But in cases of domestic violence, I have always only have one advice; Get out, fast! In situations like that, divorce is justified. There are other less serious ways that might justify divorce to certain people and I admit that in some cases like that I support the decision as well. I'm just saying do not end your marriage because of something flimsy.

In every relationship, from time to time there are bound to be misunderstandings or disagreements. You cannot escape them. How you deal with them matters a lot. So, we will be touching what to do during a fight. I would like to remind you that a relationship has the power to control your mood and even your commitment to every other thing going on in your life so it has to be just right. The perfect fit.

I will like to state in advance that this series might not be as regular as; A Journey To A Better Me. I like to take my time while writing about issues concerning relationships so I'm certain that I write it and it is received without any distortion to the message I am trying to pass across. I hope this series is of help to someone out there. Questions are welcome as well as personal opinions.

Since this is my area of specialization, I cannot tell you how excited I am. I just hope I reach someone that needs to hear my message.

I can be reached via the following:

Email:
adupeola@gmail.com
ayomideodewale92@gmail.com

Twitter: @Adupe_ola

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