A Lesson In The Art Of True Commitment

Please read the following passage carefully;

When a male eagle gets to a certain point in the season of his life, he becomes uneasy and then he sets out to find a female. When he finds one, they begin a game of tag, which is actually a type of courtship. His uneasiness is a longing for love! It is time for him to grow up. The female eagle soars high in the sky in a figure-eight pattern and makes the male eagle chase her. Now he is no longer flying his own course; he is following someone else – someone who appears to be going in a strange direction.

After a little while she dives to the ground, picks up a twig, flies up to about ten thousand feet, and drops the twig. He dives at approximately two hundred miles per hour to catch the twig in midair and takes it back to her. What is her response? She ignores him.

At this point, even though he probably feels very insulted, he has a decision to make: “Am I going to get committed and see this through to the finish? Is this really what I want? Or should I just forget about this and find something a little easier to do with my time?”

The female eagle repeats this process, and she makes the male's job increasingly difficult. Each time she flies, the twig gets larger and she flies at a lower altitude. That means the twig is going to hit the ground faster, and the male will have to work harder if he wants to win her over.

This game can literally go on for days. Finally, the female gets a branch that is heavier than the male eagle. This time the female flies only five hundred feet above the ground and drops the branch. If he catches it, they go on together. If not, she flies off and leaves him; she has decided to wait for a male eagle with the tenacity to be her man.

For the male eagle to continue this process, he must be extremely committed. Once he passes the final twig test,both eagles move from courtship to the final commitment test. She flies high into the sky; he chases her;and suddenly she makes an odd move. In midair, she flips over on her back and sticks her talons up. The male moves over her and locks his talons with hers while they fall toward the earth. At this point he has made up his mind. He is committed, and he would die rather than let her go. They begin to sing a love song. They mate for life. Neither has another partner unless one dies. If the female dies, the male raises the young.

Even after the mating process is over and she is his, and they are in their nest, the male eagle continues to court the female for the rest of their lives. Male eagles have been seen to stroke the feathers of their female companions and to bring green twigs home to them long after the courtships is complete.

This is the kind of commitment which stays steady and strong throughout the course of a lifetime and I hope it is the kind of commitment you will develop in your life. – Culled from Never Give Up By Joyce Meyer

I really hope so too. I remember how fast this post came to me after I read the above passage. I reread it at least 20 times. The only thing that kept resonating in my heart was that it would be awesome to meet a man that committed to having me in his life. I have said this often enough. A real man always knows what he wants. And if he doesn't, he figures it out fast. Men can usually tell within a few minutes with a lady what they want from her. I am not denying the fact that there are some immature men out there who need things pointed out or figured out for them. A real man isn't afraid to go after what he wants no matter what it takes. Within every man is the spirit of a hunter. Men hunt things. Money, fame, power, women, etc. they never just sit down and watch things fall into place. They make things happen.

Again, I feel the need to point out that I am talking about a particular type of man. The classic man, an emotionally intelligent man. One who has matured physically, spiritually, emotionally and psychologically. This kind of man understands the stages of life and reads his life like a book. Every season is a new chapter for him.

When a man truly loves a woman, he is assured that he can conquer any obstacle in his way to her love. Even if he doesn't, he doesn't try to get back at her for rejecting him. I learned a long time ago that love doesn't conquer all...it only gives us the strength to not give up! I recently came across a true life story about a man who stayed with his college girlfriend and even went on to marry her after she had been burned badly by a fire. I know most will expect me to say that it was probably easy for him because he knew without a doubt that he loved her. That would be a wrong assumption. It couldn't have been easy. His beautiful girlfriend all of a sudden didn't look all that human anymore. Marrying her meant taking responsibility for all her medical bills and any other care she might need from time to time.

Have you ever met trauma victims? Sometimes, they lash out at the people that love them the most because they know they can't go back in time and change anything. She might think, “everyone thinks he's such a great guy because he stayed with me...did he do that out of pity?” this might cause her to transfer aggression to her husband from time to time. I know love is hard work but that kind of love needs a total commitment of the heart, body, finances, etc. I wonder how he does it.

I don't think I know anyone that can do that. I'm sure men like that still exist, I just don't know any. The above illustration teaches us two things; the commitment of the male eagle to winning the heart of a particular female eagle, not minding the hard work, discipline, determination and time required to do so...secondly, it teaches us the commitment of the female eagle to waiting for the male eagle with the tenacity to be her man.

Ladies, we should take a page from that of the female eagle. It doesn't pay to settle for just any man so we can say we're taken too. Isn't it better to get it right the first time around instead of trying over and over. I know from personal experience that by doing trying over and over...you wear out your heart, you get it all scarred and make it a little harder for it to love and trust healthily. Do not be with a man out of loneliness or pity. Be with the man that is worth you. You're a priceless jewel. You cannot afford to continue to give pearls to swines...they will just trample all over it.

We're moving into a new year. A new year is a new beginning...evaluate your relationships...are you with the Right person or you're with Mr./Miss Right Now? Understand that it's okay to be single for a season if you're yet to be part of a couple. I want the best for you in the coming year. In your relationships, careers and every of your endeavors. I know it's about time for new year resolutions. Commit to them. I believe in you. I know you won't break them this time around. I hope you learned a thing or two from the eagles.

I will try to write once more before the year ends...I'm a bit excited, are you?

Happy New Year In Advance!!!

Adupeola